josiah+co. Blog — faith

Today I choose

Melissa Sulley faith Loss Miscarriage Miscarriage Awareness Missed Miscarriage Motherhood Parenting after loss Pregnancy after loss Pregnancy and loss awareness

Yesterday marked one month since I birthed Jordan into Heaven. But I completely forgot until this morning.

I was reflecting on yesterday, and was wondering why I was having such a difficult day emotionally. In addition to it being the one month mark, I also had a super frustrating appointment with my family doctor - I won’t get into details, but basically I walked out feeling unheard.

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Wunder - Heidi's Story

Melissa Sulley faith Loss Miscarriage Miscarriage Awareness Missed Miscarriage October Parenting after loss Pregnancy after loss Pregnancy and loss awareness Resources

Wunder - Heidi's Story

This week, in honour of Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day we are honoured to share Heidi's story with you. Heidi is mom to two Earth-side babes, Eleanor and Henry, and one Heaven-side babe, Wunder. She is also the seamstress behind Darling Emma Handmade.

Here is her story.

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Anger, bitterness, and donuts

Melissa Sulley faith Loss Miscarriage Miscarriage Awareness Missed Miscarriage Parenting after loss Pregnancy after loss

I wish I could tell you this happy go lucky, awesome faith filled story of how Jesus got me through my miscarriages. But the truth is, I’m still in my valley, and God still feels really far away. Like a distant cousin who has forgotten I exist. I know deep down this is NOT the TRUTH… but that’s how it feels. I feel abandoned, I feel downtrodden, I feel utterly hopeless. And the thing is… that’s okay.

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Together we weep

Melissa Sulley faith Loss Miscarriage Miscarriage Awareness Missed Miscarriage Parenting after loss Pregnancy after loss

I can still see you there, lying on the bed, covered in a towel.

Lifeless. Breathless.

Your skin was so red, so translucent.

I was so afraid to touch you. Afraid I would break you.

But you were already broken.

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Sequoia

Melissa Sulley faith Loss Miscarriage Miscarriage Awareness Missed Miscarriage Parenting after loss Pregnancy after loss

Sequoia

I was convinced this babe was our Sequoia.

The long awaited for one after another late loss.

The harvest after a long winter.

Our final babe to complete our family.

I believed my season had come, that this seed would turn into my Sequoia.

 

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